Roller coaster

This morning I heard from our agency.  One question that plagues a lot of adoptive families is wondering how often you should contact them, or how often they will be contacting you.  Will they update you if nothing has changed?

I've contacted our agency twice since becoming a waiting family.  This morning they responded and reassured us that they are doing their part, but that we shouldn't be concerned if we don't hear from them.  They also spoke of an out of the blue type scenario last weekend.  A woman gave birth and decided right then and there to place her child.  Another family was waiting longer than we've been waiting, and they were geographically closer.  So they were chosen.

I've read several different blogs focusing on the topic of patience in adoption.  I see things like:

"The right child will come to you when the time is right."

"Just be patient and stay busy."

"Be thankful you're just a couple now while you still have privacy."

Each of these sentences seems as foreign to me as the next.  It's not that we don't know any of these things.  We know we can't force the timing.  We have zero say in that.  We know we need to stay busy or focused on something else if we don't want to lose our minds in anticipation.  And we are grateful for our marriage and every adventure we have shared.  But not a single one of these changes how we feel.  And invariably, these suggestions come from people who are already matched parents.  Sure, they have the benefit of experience, but I almost think it's easier to hear those words from people still in our position.  Those who also listen to the ticking of the clock and just wonder...when?